strange happenings.

ok, starting with the not-so-strange, a fair no. of the Hons class was invited to Didi's party yesterday. it was supposed to be a "graduation cum catch-up-with-everyone" gathering, but i guess it made sense to celebrate her birthday at the same time since it's only days away. now, i feel sheepish for turning up without a gift. BUUUT, good thing i made muffins =) and they didn't fail!!! hahaha...

Vincent was there, Kinky was there, Veron was there... Ben and Fiona, Hazel, Tim, Alvin and his two Taiwanese friends, Jacob and Emily were too. Didi's best friend (whose name i can't spell) came later, and together with Veron, tore the house down :P mmm, authentic malay fare. food was awesome. funny thing was, i was thirsty while waiting for Ben at J*urong Point so i got myself some bubble tea. then everyone at the party thought i got it from the buffet table at Didi's place and wondered why they didn't see it. Didi, if u're reading this, u know what to serve us next time around! just kidding ;)

ahhh, we had a good time catching up. Bro was cracking a whole lot of racist jokes abt Didi again, seriously, tt guy never passes up a chance to "suan" someone. for the last time, her family wants her to be a career woman, not marry her off to push out a baby a year! anyway, Erin and i got a ride from Alvin to City Hall MRT. Al and Tim were taking Jacob and Emily to the Fryer. oops, i meant Flyer. we had some fun making fun of Tim and his mandarin, and Al of his strange accent he puts on when he meets people from abroad. i really hope our Taiwanese friends were sufficiently amused!

on to today, i should've mentioned this a long time ago, but i like running along the jogging track at the Wood*bridge asylum. it's really tranquil and the air is fresh, for most parts anyway. last Thursday, i ran past the section of the track that faces the back of some of the blocks where mental patients live. they usually smile, wave and say hi to joggers, so i waved back. approaching the corner of the track leading to the exit, i heard a woman beyond the walls singing the National Anthem so i joined her. i wonder if she appreciated my participation...

Thursday's encounters aren't all that unusual. today, at the same section facing the back of the blocks, they did the same, only they wished me "happy new year" so i wished them a merry xmas in return. then at the corner of the blocks, i spied an old guy on his own, looking out of a locked steel gate. he waved and smiled at me, with his willy sticking out of his shorts! ahahahhahahaha. darn cute lah, these people. i'm sure some other prissy girl would've covered her face with her hands, grown wings at her ankles and sped right off. to me, the inmates are just behaving like little kids, so i just tried to ignore his privates, waved and continued on my way. that's a story to tell eh? hahahhahaa! my mom gets more and more astonished and worried each time i tell her stories about what i see and do there :P

how?

how do i make a habit of blogging? i feel it's important to me, yet i can't seem to steel myself to put my thoughts down in words for an audience. i couldn't believe my eyes when i checked out my old blog. those had pretty regular posts and lots of flair. sigh, i've lost it.

Up!

ok, even though this post is an attempt to win a pair of preview screening tix to Disney's "Up", i really have to say that i'm absolutely looking forward to the movie. last night, i caught Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince with Ferdi, my cousin Stacey and her mom, and we saw the "Up" trailer before the movie started.

the movie promises to be a ball, to say the least; what with a flying house, an oversized and over-amiable bird, and a talking dog! now Carl, the old guy, is a very intriguing anti-thesis of our average movie protagonist. he's old, cranky and... not very appealing to the movie's target audience of little tikes. BUT. he is a character many people can relate to. even though i don't wanna end up like him, having to fulfill my dreams of adventure when my bones are creaking and my jaw's coming loose, i seriously admire his guts in giving his dream a go, however insane it may seem. i mean, if it does come to that, i would abandon all my cares and go for it, just like him!

and Russell... he kinda reminds me of my days as a girl guide. he's the awkward kid trying to fulfill his one-good-deed-a-day requirement when all of a sudden, he finds himself on an unexpected adventure! lucky him, he's been preparing himself all his short, little life for what's about to ensue! but what's most important about Russell is the goofy, cheery disposition he seems to keep about him. though a little scatter-brained, he's good company on an adventure of a lifetime. =)

on a more somber note, when i watch the movie, i'll be thinking of the 10 yr-old Californian girl who got to watch "Up" before she passed away of cancer. kudos to the folks at Disney Pixar for arranging the special screening and memorabilia for her.

Kevin, Russell, Dug and Carl

UP in Singapore Cinemas opening 7th August 2009

frick.FRICK.

brought my 8gd SD card along to Wei Lien’s so that i could leech of his music. but he didn’t have a card reader and is a Mac user so that plan fell through. when i got home, i soaked my clothes without taking out the SD card from my FBTs! it was friggin’ soaked for an hour before i realised ok?! thank goodness it’s still working if not i’ll really go kill myself. ok, maybe not.

7-60-100

7km in 60 mins with a 100 Plus thrown in.

 

got to see the paper butterfly that Wei Lien saved for me from the Viva concert. and you see that black towel under it? that’s CHRIS MART*N’S TOWEL. Wei Lien saw him use it so he made a grab for it after the concert! there used to be Chris’ DNA on it! pity he washed it though, hahahahaha…

thanks much, ol’ pal.

glimpses.

ich habe ins kino gegangen!

"i've been to the movies!" ahahahaha. it's been ages, i swear! since Ferdi left for Stockholm, i hadn't stepped into a cinema for a single movie till yesterday afternoon! after our paper on wednesday, Kit, Wei Lun and i headed to Vivo for lunch. surprisingly, Wei Lun wasn’t all that annoying! hahahahhahaha… hmm, can't recall the name of the restaurant, but it has ajisen and some other Japanese restaurants combined into one. here's us and our chow:

and don’t worry, that was just his appetizer, lol.

kit dear with her ramen!

shucks, i forgot to ask them to take one of me with my omu curry rice…

aaanyhoo. we bought tix for   then hung around and waited for gloria jean’s  3pm chillers deal. we got our fix of caffeine to go and snuck them into the cinema :P and boy oh boy, is Wolverine awesome! <3 him to bits!!!!!

he’s totally the type of guy i dig.  just like Aragorn, he’s ultra masculine, lean, reserved, and of course, totally protective of the woman he loves. guys out there looking for girls should take a leaf or two out of their books. those traits may not be universally embraced, but they definitely have a significant fan base ;)

the movie’s pretty good in my opinion but, of course, you’ll think i’m biased since i like both Wolverine and Hugh Jackman. let me explain. ong sf in the ST said it was better than the previous instalment but is still an average popcorn movie, giving it 3 out of 5 stars. she tells the reader that she misses Jackman’s dry humour in the earlier instalments but i suppose she was just busy swooning over Wolverine’s biceps and pecs  while he dished out his one liners… and if you actually THINK about it, this movie is supposed to be darker than the ones focusing on the X-Men. this is, after all, the story of how Wolverine came to be, not Evan Almighty! every major superhero has a sombre past; would you expect yourself to laugh at how Spidey came about? his uncle died, for goodness’ sake.

as for the script, i think David Benioff did a really good job. ong sf feels he lacks the nimbleness of his predecessors, but i think she needs to re-align her expectations of the film. she’s reviewing this movie as if it were meant to be a campy superhero excursion, but it’s not! Benioff has made full use of his characters to deliver wit and depth, trust me on this.

that said, i think Liev Schreiber was fantastic as Victor (who will go on to become Sabretooth). he could’ve turned in the model answer by making Victor really nasty through and through, yet the slight subtlety to his take on the character gave it a lot more real for the audience.

and just for laughs ;)

well, now that you’ve heard from me, go catch it in the cinemas! inject some moolah into the local economy pronto.

a muggy sort of weekend.

got cut washing dishes. i mean, why the hell would a glass bowl grow splinters?!

ahhh, a storm long overdue.

marie, daryl and i having a ‘let’s look spastic!’ contest. apparently, my right eye’s pretty retarded. really.

thanks for the Strawberry Cheesecake B&J’s ;)

Batman

HAD to steal this from Sam’s blog:

AIRPORT SECURITY: What’s your name?
PASSENGER: Batman.
AS: Your real name, please.
P: My name IS Batman.
AS: Are you trying to be funny?! What’s your surname?
P: Superman.
Airport security handcuffs him & puts him in a locked security facility.

forgiveness.

not sure if i've been forgiven, but i guess you two are really magnanimous to have tried to put it behind us right away. i’m really thankful for that, and i hope to make amends as best i can. i know that i can never heal the wounds i inflicted by my thoughtlessness, but i’d like to ask for a chance to be that better friend to all of you. it’s not in my nature to call people up for chats, yet, if that would bring us all closer, i will try. some of what i’m saying here might sound hypocritical, but please please please believe that every word is 200% sincere cos i cherish all of you. thank you for being there for me. may i grow some sense and be more sensitive to your feelings in future; and may our friendship grow stronger as we banish the obstacles that come our way.

i <3 Click.

life's a blast! yeah right.

alone in the Hons room with my music on a rainy saturday yet again. it's making me feel a lil emo, but i'm trying to convince myself that my life is almost perfect. after all, i'm only left with my ISM (only?!), eco-d presentation and catchment report. then i'll have 20 days to mug for 2 papers, after which i'll be jetting off to Tokyo with Balls and Shaz dear!

it's starting to get to me, that the sem is almost over. that my student life is almost done. that i'm losing my excuse to live off my parents. hahahaha! just kidding. sho shaaaad... =( pretty soon, we'll all be singing to Avenue Q's "I Wish I Could Go Back to College"! even though happy times are coming to an end, i have many things to be thankful for.

i'm really glad to have gotten to know Click since our youthful yr 1 days. the gratitude for the friendship, love and support you guys have shown me throughout the past 4 yrs goes beyond my mastery with words.

and since the beginning of Hons year, i've gotten to know some friends a little better. i wouldn't trade our days together for anything. in no order of merit:

Didi: awesome. just awesome. friendly, helpful, great taste in music, likes Andys, hates lizards, fellow linguist! what would Hons year be without you...

Veron: awesome2! hahhaa! glad to have shared fieldwork, kinky stuff and all assorted rubbish with you. must teach me yoga in future k?!

Liling: thanks for brightening our stressful days with your cheery personality and neverending nonsense e.g. punking me with Ziggy's fb! honey pork here we come!!!

Erin: sweet, sweet girl. fellow BTNR explorer and H!ggs' fieldwork daughters. i'll miss our days of fieldwork and sharing lit with each other. thanks for just being you!

Val P: together, we're the Valsss! physical geographers summore. i'll reminisce our gossip sessions Indiana H!ggs and soon to be Indiana Z!gg.

Puey Ling: how old are you arh? 296? lol. was real glad to have played a part in your bday celebrations. and how can we forget those $3 frappes at gloria jean's with Mel! "i loved him yesterday. i love him today. i will love him tomorrow and forever." ahahahaha!

Mel aka Mrs Owyong: blurblock. so-and-so pulled a Mel. hahahhaa. we're really gonna miss you dearie, when u're spending time being a good wife to John. don't stare at streetwalkers or give beer to drivers anymore ok?!

Alvin: lovable paranoid android. alvin, drive faster! love the sarcasm and self-deprecating humour btw. ;)

Tim: pourquoi?! stop being scared of pontianaks and ghosts! lol. thanks for teaching me a bit of excel the other time!

Ben Yuan: another blurblock. stop forgetting my name, swinging things into my face, and remember to do really important things like FFG! haha, thanks for being such a caring friend!

Sophie: another asbolutely sweet soul. and my bday sis! wish i had more opportunities to know you better. thanks for the gerberas, love!

Wins: the internet is for porn!!! absolutely enjoy talking rubbish and singing Avenue Q with you. don't stress k? *hugs* let's drag the others to have PE again soon!

Vince: you gotta work on your jokes, dude! :P such a down-to-earth guy, real glad to know you. don't forget me when you become rich and famous!

Weixiong: more fat days and PE together k! i strive to be as lean as you :P

Hazel: ah, my romantic friend... even though i keep making fun of your romantic thoughts, i'm quite the romantic too! so we'll go do romantic things together in future, like ride horses in wide open meadows and picking lavender in the sunset. hee...

Clare: yet another sweetie. seeing a bit more spunk in this one now though! we need to share our K-idols with each other :P

Barney & Petrina: you two are like twins! although i can't imagine 2 purple dinosaurs though... can't believe i'm only knowing you two better in year 4 when we could've been better friends in NY. fate works in funny ways...

Wei Lun: MSN buddy! i know what you did last summer... hahaha! you make me feel like i'm in secondary school again! and you're pretty fun to have around, until you start forgetting your limits... thanks for the cake, mate!

and last but not least, Bro: i still can't believe i hated your guts till the almost the middle of yr 4 sem 1 lah! i'm REALLYYYYY grateful i got to know you for a second time. you got my back and i got yours. ;) someday, i'm gonna compile a list of the "derogatory" names you've conferred upon me and shove them all back at you. HA!

all this is just the tip of the iceberg. if i reminisce any more right now, i think i might just cry... oh well, back to ISM. love you all, my amazing friends.

zonked.

spent a very dreary 23rd bday yesterday by no fault of anyone's. thanks peeps, for all the bday wishes and hugs! and thanks Veron and Didi for the chocolate and the sweet German note that came with it =) Wei Lun and Ben Yuan bought me nice slice of chocolate cake from olio dome and was gonna celebrate with me, after catchment but i had to rush off to submit the engin proj so they left before i got back. so sad...

funny Bro... he didn't know it was my bday and he was like "eh, why didn't you tell me it was your birthday?!" like it's my fault for not drawing attention to it. -_-'''

dinner was chicken rice at some market in Dover, Bro's treat. thanks Bro, still owe ya a shake. we went back to the Hons rm to do work, and we ended up taking some really ugly pics using Veron's Mac. check them out on facebk. ;)

on the way home, met some creepy, drunk uncle at the bus stop outside NJ. there was just the two of us... he asked me abt whether 961 was still running at that time and i told him yes. after he sat down at the bench diagonally in front of me, he kept turning around to look at me. it was so unnerving! i sms-ed bro and he told me to walk away to somewhere with people. even if it was a good idea, where was i gonna find ppl at 11+pm along Bkt Timah Road??? fortunately, my bus came and i got away. *shudders*

got home, showered, got cracking on my eco presentation. i slept a grand total of 2.5h! shiok max. ahahahaha. sadly, my presentation bombed. i think there was no interesting way to present a paper so dry that the words actually get stuck in your throat on their way out.

sophie, my gorgeous birthday sis, bought a stalk of gerbera for each person in class, including H*rvey Neo. so sweet right?? i got 3 cos it was my birthday too! :P thanks babe!

anyways, i'd like to thank my lovely friends for the remembering my birthday and sending me all those facebk and text messages. love y'all.

oh yeah, i got punkd. for the full story, please ask me in person. heh.

i love you all

Leave Out All the Rest - Linkin Park

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared

After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shared what I made

I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are

When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are

grad trip

i'm leavin' on a jet plane
don't know when i'll be back again...

actually i do. this is how it goes. tentatively:

11-21 May - Tokyo with Balls and Shaz dear
22 May - London with Bro
23-26 May - Berlin on my own
27-29 May - Munich with Liling
30 May-9 June - USA/Canada (Boston, NY, Toronto) with Bro
10-12 June - London with Bro, Liling, Matt, PL, Ying Zhi?
12 June - Singapore

so excited! my grad trips cover 3 continents!!! and the best part? i finally get to go to Germany! XD but i'm so not looking forward to making a fool of myself with broken German. last evening, i replied Frau Verry with 'oui' instead of 'ja'. faints...

random bday thingy

http://www.paulsadowski.com/BirthData.asp

Your date of conception was on or about 14 July 1985 which was a Sunday.

You were born on a Sunday under the astrological sign Aries.
Your Life path number is 7.
Your fortune cookie reads: In the end there are three things that last: faith, hope and love; and the greatest of these is love.

Life Path Compatibility:
You are most compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 1, 5 & 7.
You should get along well with those with the Life Path numbers 4 & 22.
You may or may not get along well with those with the Life Path number 9.
You are least compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 2, 3, 6, 8 & 11.
Your birthday falls into the Chinese year beginning 2/9/1986 and ending 1/28/1987.
You were born in the Chinese year of the Tiger.
Your Native American Zodiac sign is Hawk; your plant is Dandelion.

As of 3/14/2009 10:45:05 AM EST
You are 22 years old.
You are 275 months old.
You are 1,196 weeks old.
You are 8,378 days old.
You are 201,082 hours old.
You are 12,064,965 minutes old.
You are 723,897,905 seconds old.
Celebrities who share your birthday:

Zach Braff (1975) <— me like…
Candace Cameron (1976)
Ari Meyers (1969)
Marilu Henner (1952)

John Ratzenberger (1947)
Philip Austin (1941)
Merle Haggard (1937)

Billy Dee Williams (1937)
Andre Previn (1929)
Lowell Thomas (1892)

Butch Cassidy (1866)

Top songs of 1986

That's What Friends Are For by Dionne & Friends
Walk Like an Egyptian by Bangles

On My Own by Patti LaBelle & Michael McDonald
Greatest Love of All by Whitney Houston

Stuck with You by Huey Lewis & the News
Rock Me Amadeus by Falco

Kyrie by Mr. Mister
Kiss by Prince & the Revolution

Papa Don't Preach by Madonna
How Will I Know by Whitney Houston

Your age is the equivalent of a dog that is 3.27906066536204 years old. (Life's just a big chewy bone for you!)
Your lucky day is Tuesday.
Your lucky number is 9.
Your ruling planet(s) is Mars & Pluto.
Your lucky dates are 9th, 18th, 27th.
Your opposition sign is Libra.
Your opposition number(s) is 6.

Today is not one of your lucky days!

There are 23 days till your next birthday <— hint hint
on which your cake will have 23 candles.
Those 23 candles produce 23 BTUs,
or 5,796 calories of heat (that's only 5.7960 food Calories!) .
You can boil 2.63 US ounces of water with that many candles. 

Your birth flower is DAISY
Your birthstone is Diamond

The Mystical properties of Diamond

Diamonds are said to increase personal clarity to help one see things clearly as well as be straight-forward and honest. Supposedly, the higher quality the diamond, the better it is supports these qualities.

Some lists consider these stones to be your birthstone. (Birthstone lists come from Jewelers, Tibet, Ayurvedic Indian medicine, and other sources)

Opal, Quartz, White Sapphire

Your birth tree is

Rowan, the Sensitivity

Full of charm, cheerful, gifted, without egoism, likes to draw attention, loves life, motion, unrest and even complications, is both dependent and independent, good taste, artistic, passionate, emotional, good company, does not forgive.

The moon's phase on the day you were
born was waning crescent.

some backlog…

realised that i didn’t hit “publish” so please pardon the oldness of the entry…

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went for Matt’s Baba House excursion and i’m happy to say i enjoyed myself. did you know… traditional Peranakan houses actually have peepholes in the floor that let bibiks look down from the second level to observe guests and even spit sireh down at them if they don’t like them? how civilised… muahahaha!

after Baba House, we had lunch in the arts canteen then Erin, Didi and myself met Higgs in his office. my progress is dismal. i feel panicky and disheartened all at the same time. and i know i’m supposed to get cracking, but i’ve never felt this slack my entire life. someone prod me please!

next up was the project meeting for Innovativeness. PL and i headed over to Raffles City to meet Mel at Gloria Jean’s. ice blended drinks are going for $3 from 2-7pm, happy happeee day~ though we were distracted here and there, we managed to complete our agenda and then some, as you can tell!

 

when we were done discussing, the rich music and tantalising tango beats led us like the pied piper’s mice into That CD Shop. we sampled lots of CDs, i even listened to some old Chinese big band tracks. after some hunting, Mel got PL one of the High Society series CDs for her bday then we headed home.

i <3 Mel and PL! and gloria jean’s for 3 bucks :P

catchment, anyone?

most reluctantly, i dragged myself out of bed at 9 to meet Small Ben at YCK MRT at 9.45 for our field site recce. val, he was there to give u a lift, so would you pls not be so lazy and take it for granted? *slaps meself*

we picked Wei Lun up at bkt panjang and headed over to the marsh on the other side of BTNR. yes, i know i’ve bid the damn place adieu, but what can i do when it’s two against one??? anyway, we parked near some gate to PUB then walked along the bike trails to our first site where Wei Lun often jogs. it was a marsh! quite interesting to see a natural-looking water body in sg man… and it had fish in it! no, they weren’t dead ones, in fact, some grew to quite a decent size. we discussed a little, took some pics, then walked out to the smaller marsh on the outside, near the pipes that bring our water in from johor. there, i encountered my first wild snake! it was pretty cute! i googled it, think it’s some kinda non-venomous kukri found in sg. anyway, it slithered away in a split second so i had no time to take a picture of it, unlike cam-whoring monitor lizards and long-tailed macaques…

after looking around for a bit, we went back into the forested area around the marsh. kaypoh Wei Lun walked slightly more towards the marsh, slipped and landed hard on his tush. must’ve hurt since he hasn’t got much cushioning there :P then while Ben and i were chatting, enjoying the shade, breeze and tranquillity, the joker nicely walked into the marsh to test the stability of the bed material. Ben and i continued chatting and brainstorming, and the next thing we knew, Wei Lun had bashed into the jungle. siao lah, that one.

having had his fun, he came back and we discussed in proper for abt half an hr. i can guarantee you, that has got to be one of the best places for a proper project discussion. you don’t have laptops, people, food or drinks to distract you from the task at hand. when we were done, we headed back to the car and decided to lunch at BPP, Ben’s “wife’s” territory, lol.

we had some fish and chips at the Naked dunnowhat. the food was nothing to hoot about, but the conversation, which revolved around police and thieves, was excellent sustenance for the curiosity.

----------------------------------------------------------------

damn pissed at what happened later in the day. tutee forgot abt our lesson and cancelled yet again, which meant another loss in income. then i decided to head straight for Wei Lien’s but he was still mugging in school cos he thought i’d be there around 4+. so two things were bombed instead of one, thanks arh jowo, u owe me big time. at least after i got home and showered, i had a wonderful 2.5h nap cos it was raining.

i need a stable source of income…

my first practical

went shooting at Hortpark with Big Ben today. it started off hot and sunny but got cloudy in an hour or so. i’ve got nth much to show for it, i’m afraid. =( but at least i gained some experience and got to play with his tamron, helios and tessar, hee! Ben arh, not sure if you’ll ever read this, but i’m mighty glad to have had a second chance to know you. you’re like the BFG! haha!

decided to indulge in a cup of bubble tea from hougang pt on my way home. but when i got to my front door, i realised that i was locked out! tsk. so i went back down to the void deck and played around some more with the tessar i borrowed from Ben till my dad got back. (–_-)””

after i started up my lappie, i got a “msg” from a sec sch friend on MSN about health supplements. of all times lah! my antivirus had expired and i hadn’t reinstalled it so i tio the damn thing even though i didn’t click on it.

ok, guess i’ve done my part for the day. peace out.

my 450D, D for Darling

okay... i've thought of a new nick for Ferdi! instead of having to share "Dear" with Grace, Kit and Shaz dears, he'll henceforth be known as Awesomeness! haha.

now on to my big announcement: I've finally got myself a DSLR!!! as the title suggests, it's the canon 450d and I LOVE IT!!! of course, it's still no match with my Awesomeness :P

here's a test shot that passed my current low QC standards to have made it onto my blog!



it's not great, but it'll do for now since i haven't exactly familiarised myself with my cam yet. and hey, lenses play a big part too!

yesterday was action-packed ah. stoopid HN had a 1h housekeeping lect but i didn't blame him for it since i could leave early for BTNR. Veron, Didi and i cabbed both ways, shiok man. yesterday's visit was our farewell to BTNR as our field site, we took down everything we had to. when we signed out, the park keepers were joking abt Didi's soil samples that if lots of NUS students took soil samples from BTNR, we'd move the whole hill to Kent Ridge -_-''' old ppl, have a really strange sense of humour...

later in the evening, the hons class usual suspects minus a couple of key figures, went for cheap french food at serene centre. wahhh, le confit c'est bien! will definitely go again with Awesomeness =) dessert was 2 scoops of happiness from island creamery. though the ice cream was heavenly, we descended into the depths of hell and moral decay as we bitched abt life (content is classified).

ok, dunno what else to so say, so once again, i'd like to proclaim my undying love for my hons mates! *hugs u all to bits* bis der nächster Ausflug im März!!!

Chinese New Year!!!

hullo! guess most ppl are out visiting right now, i'm waiting to go over to my ah ma's house too. that's where everyone goes, and that's also where all the fun is. can't believe one of my granduncles came so early this morning that daryl and i hadn't time to get out of bed and wash up! it's an invasion of privacy i tell u! but a happy one lah :P

ang baos of the world unite, and please find ur way into my pockets! muahahaha. valerie out.

getting back in shape

val, you're doing good, give yourself a pat on the back! *pat pat*

haha, so thick-skinned right? but i really think i've been doing well in terms of making an effort to exercise and live life to the max. been hanging out with me unmarried 20+ yr old cousins and my lovely hons classmates! last saturday night was pool and pub with Ferdi, Adeline, Ray, Yuexin jie2, Jeryn jie2 + Ben aka future cousin-in-law. the pool part was good, but i realised that we're just not the type to hang out in pubs. this sunday's gonna be badminton, healthy stuff, ha.

oh and i'm sooo glad that the hons class has deemed wednesday as PE day! first one was badminton, sadly, i could only go for the last hr of it. this week's was frisbee and some random activities cos Our Melody was so late. here's a sample: skipping (so pri sch PE!), limbo rock (?!), and extended shuttle run!

and today, i followed the timetable i set out for myself and ran for 4km around hougang happy house, then came back and "worked out" at the fitness corner. so proud of myself for managing to keep that self-discipline k! too bad that doesn't apply to my studies... =( oh well, shall try to be more disciplined for that too, it's the final sem le!

Day 2, 200109

2145h

I'm gonna be honest, I cried again last night. I kept myself up all the way till 2am just to procrastinate going to bed, to avoid meeting the demons I managed to keep at bay; yet it was to no avail. As i kissed our love tokens goodnight, they became indistinct silhouettes against the dim light of the table lamp. My heart, against my better judgement, was heeding the advice of that fat bird, to cry if it made me feel better. Anyone who has pined for anyone would understand that the more one thinks about their loved one separated from themselves, the harder it is to come to terms with it. But then again, the fat bird only gave it ten days. We shall see.

Having had to battle peak hour crowds did not permit the luxury of penning my thoughts so i just stood and stared blankly into space. Occasionally, my mind wandered off to Ferdi's side. This made my body jealous, being physically unable to join him in Sweden. So i had to will my mind back to Singapore, where my body was trapped riding the northeast line with a bunch of zombified commuters living out their mundane existence. I was no different from them, really. His absence has sucked all the meaning and joy from the things i do, leaving the past two days a wretched vacuum. All i want to do is stay locked in a neverending embrace with him. Given current circumstances, I'd make do with just sitting in front of my computer waiting for a message from him.

You know, through all the mucus and tears last night, i found comfort in the Q&A game he and i have been playing every year at the fireworks festival. It's like knowing each other all over again, familiar and heartwarming, yet entirely refreshing at the same time. Most conversations between people go unrecorded, and even if they were recorded, they go unrevised. Even though it was a game, the words on the paper, some smudged by rain drops, hold so much meaning and memories of our time together.

Q: What do you like to think about?
A: Sometimes at night or before i go out, i think about the things i can do with you the next day, things that'll touch you, to make you smile.

Just reading through them brought me the comfort I needed for banishing the despair i felt when i realised that i hadn't a single picture of us in my phone and how i didn't bother to take one. Certainy, our love is made of much sterner stuff than intangible digital images on an electronic device, and far more real than what our eyes perceive.

There is a glimmer of hope, a possibility that i could banish the demons tonight.

Give me just one message before i turn in. I'll make it work, i promise.

Day 1, 190109

disclaimer: might be too emo and mushy for general consumption.

1305h

On the way to school. Eyes are puffy from crying yesterday afternoon and before falling asleep. Some fat bird told me things about having one's TSO leave for SEP:

1. It will make or break the relationship.
2. The first ten days will be hell.

I don't remember if there's anything else to glean from last night's online conversation, but i figured these will probably be the essential points to keep in mind.

There really isn't anything to disagree on in those two points, even if you did try to deconstruct them, peel the layers of fat and muscle away to reveal the bones. All that would've been accomplished was to prove the resilience of their truth. I'm not worried. Not at all. He and I can master the currents that pull and keep us apart, predict the storms that come our way. After all, what have the past 2.5 years been built upon? And as for the first ten days being hell, i suppose i'll be fine as long as i surround myself with company in my waking hours and keep myself occupied. It is a known fact that the demons only come out at night. I think I'll hold out just fine. In fact, there are so many things I have on my to-do list that i doubt i could squeeze in time for more crying and moping. But then again, my emotions are sentient beings beyond my brain's control and I am firmly enslaved by them. Who knows when I will next morph into a puddle of hot, salty tears from the throbbing ache?

I hope that i'm not exploiting this opportunity to be melodramatic, overly emotional and altogether seem as if i were begging for sympathy, cos i'm not. It is a fine line between that and the genuine pining that i am feeling and ought to feel. I have to bear in mind that both of us have to be strong during these trying times, to look forward instead of dwelling on the fact that he's not here to give me the support i've grown to be so reliant upon, not here to crack his lame jokes just to make me laugh, not here to purr in satisfaction when i stroke the back of his ear, not here to catch movies in the cinema or in the comfort of his room, not here to cook aglio together, or apply heat to a random assortment of ingredients, not here to tuck me into bed...

2100h

I'm sitting at the bus stop outside Joanne's place. The demons beckon, they're getting closer with every stroke of my pen. It's a cool night, unusual considering the warm monsoon we've been having. I wonder how he is... GMT+1, that's seven hours behind Singapore; it'll be another four hourse or so before he lands in cold, cold Sverige. Another five to seven hours before he calls to tell me he's safe and how friggin' cold Stockholm is. I'm envious, sad and happy for him all at once. I wish i had taken the chance. Even Australia would've been nice. New Zealand would've rocked of course. But this is not my story to tell.

Hey dear,

It must be really cold there! Does your breath fog up in front of you? Enjoy everything and every second of it ok? Even more so cos I'm here thinking of you. <3

Maybe i'll have more to say later besides 'i miss you' and 'i love you', so I'll just leave it at that for now.

Yours always,
Val

P.S. Keep making memories cos you're gonna weave them into exciting stories to share with me when you get back.